'Just the way you are'

Warwick among the first municipalities in state to marry same-sex couples last Sunday WARWICK - I do. A Brooklyn pair who have spent a great deal of time in Warwick during their nine-year relationship was the first same-sex couple in the town this past Sunday to say these two words that now legally bind them together. The marriage of TM Daly and Liam O’Malley was held at 1810 Herb Garden with friends and family in attendance, a week after their long-planned commitment ceremony was held at the Warwick home of Jo Hull, the mother of their best friend Tim Hull. They joined hundreds of other gay and lesbian couples statewide to marry on the first day that same-sex marriages became legal in New York State. Last Sunday, New York became the sixth and the largest state where gay and lesbian couples could marry following a lengthy conflict that ended when the New York State Senate approved the law on June 24 by a narrow margin. And while media reports spotlighted couples who traveled from distant places nationwide to different state locales to be wed, Daly and O’Malley, both 30, returned to the place which had special meaning for them. “Warwick is a beautiful place,” said Daly this past Tuesday. “It felt fantastic to realize we were part of the ushering in of a new era in a small town in New York.” Daly, an oil painter whose work will soon be on exhibit in Germany, and O’Malley, a preschool teacher, had domestic partner status since 2006 through the City of New York’s Domestic Partnership Registry. Their commitment ceremony plans were well in place by the time the State Senate vote happened, and the couple felt no need to change the date because of the time and effort already put into planning their ceremony. 'A place we really love’ They were, however, planning to be legally married in Connecticut at some point after their ceremony, but decided to push up the legal ceremony and have it in New York after the passage of the new law. “Our wedding (commitment ceremony) had all the power of love and the commitment to love in it,” said Daly. “But it was nice to think about making this commitment to each other that was also within the law.” The couple’s day began with a 9 a.m. appointment with Town of Warwick clerk Meg Quackenbush, who issued their license. The men then went to the County Center in Goshen where state Supreme Court Judge Robert Freehill provided the necessary 24-hour waiver. The pair then had Village of Warwick Mayor Michael Newhard marry them at 2 p.m. in the garden, followed by a celebratory meal at the Glenmere Mansion in Chester. They plan to take a wedding trip to California at the end of August, followed by a trip to Germany when Daly’s art exhibit opens. 'It felt right’ “The legality of it is just fantastic,” said Daly. “We were very proud to see that day happen in a place we really love.” The couple was keenly aware of the historical significance of the day. Daly stressed they did not set out last Sunday to be the first same-sex couple to be married in Warwick, but also felt there was really no reason to wait. “Sunday was the day where New York caught up to the love of gay individuals,” he said. “It’s such a huge step for gay men and women. It’s historic on top of being personal. When we decided to get married, it was entirely about our love and commitment to each other. The New York paperwork would give us legal rights, and the timing was perfect.” While Daly considers their commitment ceremony to be the most important of the two dates, he said the date of their legal marriage will also have a place of honor. “We made our commitment ceremony very spiritual, very meaningful,” he said. “And to have it in Warwick, our time up there has always been filled with love, with family and friends. We wanted to extend that (feeling) and continue it as if it were all one thing. We wanted to come back to Warwick and share it (their legal marriage) with the same people. It felt right. There’s two dates, but they’re really one.” Walt Whitman dreamed eloquently of 'Manahatta’ (and all of the United States) welcoming such institutional equality, but his waiting period was well over a 100 years. We are, thankfully, at last made to feel that difference in New York. I think, in a way, that week and those two dates will somehow be the full anniversary celebration for us. Most states are still making couples wait, but that doesn’t make the vows of all those couples any less important or good. Love is the thing to celebrate.” TM Daly, talking about the blending of this commitment ceremony and his legal marriage to Liam O’Malley. Sunday was the day where New York caught up to the love of gay individuals. It’s such a huge step for gay men and women. It’s historic - on top of being personal. When we decided to get married, it was entirely about our love and commitment to each other. The New York paperwork would give us legal rights, and the timing was perfect.” TM Daly of Brooklyn, who legally married his long-time partner Liam O’Malley this past Sunday in Warwick, the first day same-sex marriages became legal in New York State. Their marriage was the first of its kind in Warwick.